Youtube's Boxing Trend = Who Gives a Shit?

I can never understand Boxing. I just can't. This isn't me being a nerd who hates sportsball or anything, I tried to get into Boxing ever since I first heard of it when I was a kid. I liked the idea, a sport where you have to beat the other guy down to win, but it's just so boring to watch.

First of all, the only thing you do is you use your hands, so no kicking, no elbows, no knees, and no headbutts. Seriously, how come everywhere else I can throw kicks to end fights, but inside that Boxing ring, I can't do that? That's bullshit. There are only four techniques you can do in Boxing: Jab, Cross, Hook, and Uppercut, the rest are variants of these moves. I want to see badass spin kicks knock someone out, not some geriatric fucks dance in a ring for 12 rounds.

Speaking of which, there are 12 rounds max in Boxing. That's right, 12 rounds, each of them are 3 minutes, so that makes each bout about 36 minutes. When you take into account the rest periods, that makes about 47 minutes. Who has enough time to watch all that? At least in K-1 Kickboxing the matches lasts 3 rounds 3 minutes each (unless there are title matches going at 5) with 1 minute rest periods, that would make at worst 11 minutes (19 minutes for title matches), that makes it easier to watch.

Another Combat Sport I hate is Point Sparring Karate. All they do is lightly tap eachother, the referee stops the fight, waits for the judges to assign a point, and resets them. What the fuck? I want to see someone get knocked out with a spinning head kick, not see guys play a game of tag, it's blue balls. This goes for Fencing, Taekwondo, and Kenpo. There's a reason Muay Thai never does this, maybe you shouldn't either.

Thank God for MMA, because now we can see someone getting not only punched, but kicked, elbowed, kneed, even taken to the ground and choked. Yes, you can do so much in MMA, you can do a lot of cool stuff in Kickboxing, Shootboxing is cool too.

So why the rant on Boxing you may ask? Why of course, the whole Boxing craze on Youtube with Jake Paul and the upcoming Youtube Dipshits vs. The TikTok Dipshits coming May 15th. I might be the one who has to say it: Who cares? I couldn't give 5 single solitary shits or fucks about non-fighters attempting one of the most boring combat sports ever. The only Boxing match I did watch was with Conor McGregor, but only because I wanted him to win, but other than that, I couldn't give a shit about Mayweather vs. Paqiao back in 2015, couldn't give a shit about any Boxing match back in the 90's, and I couldn't give a shit about here-today-gone-tomorrow internet jackasses in a gimmick match where the reputations will go nowhere.

But hey, who am I to interrupt two cancerous website's users battling over who's website is less shitty in some elementary school level bum fight? I'll stick to actual stuff like Kickboxing and MMA. At least there I get to see actual skilled practitioners who learned a lot of martial arts to become a full-fledged fighter.